a story...

(this story most likely falls into the category of "you had to be there" but i'm still going to tell it. after all, i need some sort of backdrop to post an obnoxious amount of pictures of my offspring.)

recently, when in arizona, i went up to sedona with my kids for some fun. i love sedona. i really do.

its beautiful.
but boy oh boy, there sure are some nutty people there.

maybe it has something to do with the vortexes, new age crystals and general evilness. who knows.

anyhow...
so i'm taking some pictures of my kids (because i clearly can't have enough...) and this lady walks up to me, and gasps.

with her hand over her heart: "your children are absolutely beautiful!" "oh, thanks. how sweet of you to say so."

"no! really! i mean, reaaaalllllyyyy...." dramatic sigh and then glances back and forth from them to me.

(i tell this dramatically because it was dramatic.)

(and by "it" i mean "she") "um... thanks."

nervous giggle.

"they are striking!"

and she stares intently at me.for awhile. uhhh.....
"this reminds me of a family portrait i saw once..." she closes her eyes and takes a deep, dramatic breath. "the mother," pauses to look at me very intently...

"was wearing a white..."

pauses...

"... very sexy..."

pause...

"negligee." said while sweeping her hands across her, ahem, upper chest area?

(me, trying not to laugh and also resisting the urge to look for the hidden camera...)

"and the children..." closes her eyes again and another deep breath. "the oldest girl was in a beautiful lacy, white nightie..." "and the baby was naked with his precious bottom showing..."

"and all the other children were in various stages of undress."

another sigh.

"it was absolutely beautiful." ummm... did you say family portrait or calendar for perverts and pedophiles?

what followed was a slightly awkward pause where i was supposed to say something but honestly, what do i say to this? so i do the only thing i know to do and apply some sarcastic humor, you know, to lighten the nuttiness.

"well," as i sorta laugh, "think my days of posing that way are behind me." (as if they ever existed.)

shocked, the lady puts her hand on my arm, looks me up and down, and insists, "oh, but you should! it would be beautiful!" right....

now that would make an awesome christmas card this year.

and if by "sexy white negligee" you actually mean "baggy sweatpants"

then its already been done.

some days are like that...

kids say the darndest things...

a small sampling from today:

ella: "i might get in trouble for telling you this.... but... today, at nap time, i held bennett like a baby." and she raised her eyebrows and put her hands in the rocking motion.

ummm... ok? and why would i care about that?

ella: "if you laugh real loud when you toot, you don't actually have to say excuse me, because no one will hear it. its a real fun trick. you should try it."

right... bennett: "the garage smells weally, weally good, mom. it weally does."

me: "what does it smell like?"

bennett: "wine."

hmmm. should i be more worried that my garage smells like wine or that my 3 year-old knows what wine smells like?

some weekend tidbits

we went to the beach friday night. used a gift card for a fun dinner at a nice restaurant but decided if a place has linen napkins and soft music playing, we'll go ahead and pass from now until mason is 10. or can at least be sedated.

after dinner, we walked down the boardwalk and out on the pier. (i could then add here that it was pretty chilly, even with our jackets and we had to get hot chocolate to warm up but that would probably make my phoenix friends hate me. so i'll just keep that part to myself.)

saturday, we did some gardening.

("we" meaning anthony, of course. with "help" from the kids.)

he got all creative and did some awesome designer planters made from our old mahogany bed that was broken beyond repair in our move.how resourceful that man is.

every day is earth day around here.
(please disregard any mounds of disposable diapers you might see.)

sunday we celebrated with birthday boy papa:great memories with family,
fun times with cousins,

lots of good food,and absolutely no naps.
and not to worry, aunt dede. mason doesn't speak for all of us...we sure love you!

going to the chapel...

we've sorta had weddings on the brain around here. and by that i mean ella is COMPLETELY obsessed with the notion of playing "wedding" all day. every day. fortunately, the lucky man is always daddy. (lucky man also means "very good sport." i mean, come on? how cute is he?) the thrilled to death brother. (please notice rose petals scattered about the "aisle")(and the ribbons tied around the chairs... what can i say? she has an eye for detail. which is why she also wanted place cards made for the reception and a fancy "dinner." sorry, its pb&j for lunch, little bride.)vows written completely by ella without any prompting whatsoever by me. she sure retains a lot considering she's only been to one wedding. (that of "aunt" and "uncle")

"friends, we come to celebrate this wooded husband and wooded wife.

now, uncle anthony you say: 'with this ring, i celebrate this wooded wife.'

would you be nice to this wooded wife?

now aunt ella, you say: 'with this ring i celebrate this wooded husband.'

would you be nice to this wooded husband?

let the dancing begin... all i know is someday these photos will be great in that wedding picture montage before ella walks down the aisle.

("someday" of course meaning "in like 30 years when she's actually allowed to talk to boys.")

this will be it...

so who's sick of pictures of my brother's wedding?and by "my brother's wedding" i of course mean "my kids at my brother's wedding in their awesome hats, ties and princess dress." but how can i not share with you this picture: and the one of my boys (minus the boy who is digging through my purse for jelly beans... or throwing a temper tantrum...) but anyhow, this will be it... for now.

and i'll leave you with a picture of miss maureen... a very dear friend from my hometown who my daughter (and bennett too!) loves to pieces. she is a wonderful lady with 3 great kids my sister and i would babysit. her sons hated me because i was mean and i wouldn't put up with any of their lip (they were friends with chad) and i loved babysitting for them because they always had super yummy ice cream (from the schwan's truck!) and they paid very good. like i'm talking $3 an hour! and not to date myself or anything, but it was a long time ago and that was very generous.

maureen is also a faithful blog reader and she deserves a shout out. we love you maureen!

but then ...

...there were jelly beans

uncooperative

i had high hopes that this little boy would keep his hat on for most of the evening... at least the important part, anyway.
like, the "pictures with the groom" part.
not so lucky.