so yes, its been awhile since i've posted.
other than mourning over the fact that i'm not having a girl, not much else is going on around here.
well, other than a mono patient being almost completely healed, fun trips to the beach, visits with dear family and just the typical i love living in southern california summer.
while anthony has been in costa rica, roughing it for the Lord, we got to have a visit with grammy and grandma darlene.
it was such a treat to have them here. (not like grammy is old news or anything) but it was especially nice to have gramma D make the trip.
i have such found memories with my gramma D. she's always been simply amazing. generous, giving, kind, joyful.
me and gramma D.
(and that cute girl coming out of the house is my cousin lisa. apparently, according to every adult relative we have, we couldn't be left alone in the same room as children or we'd practically kill each other. but we grew up to be best friends and totally love each other even though i can't get her to play another game of words with friends with me.)
we used to visit gramma back in nebraska and it never ceased to amaze me how hard working she was, running a farm and always having enough energy to put up with the gaggles of grandchildren invading her house for the summer.
making us lemonade dessert, not yelling at us when we picked all the petals off her roses...
the family. gramma D is second from the left. (i'm of course the adorable child on the left.)
(i'm not sure why she isn't smiling here. rare, because she was always smiling. even when she cooked all those elaborate meals for all of us and instituted that nonsense about never ever ever putting the saucepans on the table and always always always using a serving dish in order to wash dishes pretty much around the clock.)
and then she moved closer and we'd visit her in phoenix and she'd always open her home to us and even let me live with her for a year after college. i've never heard the woman complain. and it wasn't like her life was easy. she's been a caregiver to almost everyone close to her and has tragically buried too many of her own children. she has a true servant's heart and i admire her sacrifice, peace, and joy.
when i was first getting to know anthony, i was telling him how my grandma was pretty much a superhero and how she could do anything at all. and he's nodding to me and smiling because everything i said back then was completely mesmerizing. but he probably didn't really believe me but as if on cue, she walked around the corner with a chainsaw and said, "well, i gotta go take care of that tree out there that is starting to scrape the roof." he's never doubted me since.
i'm so glad my kids could experience their great grandma. and while i wish they knew the gramma from a few years ago, i'm sure they'll still find memories of her whistling at the birds and talking to every single person we see extremely delightful. 
and while they are still trying to sort out things like why are the puzzle pieces supposed to be upside down? and isn't grammy actually her daughter, not her nurse? and why am i supposed to raise my hand over my head when i cough? they still really enjoyed having her here.
she's a kid herself, as happy as can be.
and i must say, she makes getting old look like a whole lot of fun.
so the amazing women in my life went back to arizona and anthony returns tonight!
and while i'm thrilled about the fact that while many men out there travel frequently for work and are gone for excessive hours every week building corporations and generating revenue and my husband gets to go on missions trips and tell people about Jesus (!!!!), i'm absolutely ecstatic that he'll be home tonight and my boys will again have someone tossing them around and slamming into them with pillows.
because lets face it, there is just no substitute for daddy in the life of little boys. and based on the amount of screaming and restlessness going on here, they. have. missed. him.
boys.
have i've mentioned how thrilled i am about another boy?
its true. i really wanted you to be a girl.
but i've decided to love you anyway.sincerely,mommyps sleep is a good thing.
saturday started as a cozy morning with breakfast at the beach.
(that is, if you actually count doughnuts as breakfast and not just some fancy, sugar filled, fried dessert they just so happen to serve in the morning...)
we watched surfers, dolphins, beach tractors.
all with cozy, cloudy, perfect weather.
the kids dug and splashed and ran their little legs off.
ella and bennett made a new friend and they dug pools and made houses and made me slightly concerned that my little mono girl was possibly overdoing it. but to see this huge smile on her face... i just decided to let her have her fun. 
and then, there was the huge wave that crashed into the kids. all fun and games until it carried mason away, underwater and all, while i'm grabbing for him and his shirt is getting ripped out of my hands and my feet get stuck in a hole and i can't reach him and i'm panicking because i can just see part of his swimsuit while all of him is rolling away in the water and my legs won't move fast enough...
and then ella's new friend's daddy came to the rescue and snatched mason up before he was washed out to sea. (he also just so happens to be ryan shappelle from 24, and also stars in naughty shows like sopranos and nurse jackie that i've never seen. but nevertheless, he spent most of the day with us and was super nice and will forever be my hero for saving my son's life.)
my "subtle picture" of our new friend, lifesaver, CTU director...
anyhow, it was horrible and dramatic and i stopped shaking by dinner.
mason, as exasperating as you can be sometimes, i would have been horribly devastated if you drowned.
so glad you lived to wake me up 3 times last night...
thanks to many wonderful people in our lives, ella has been sufficiently spoiled.
care packages, visitors, and even a gift card for when she's feeling up for some ice cream.there is something special about people loving on your kids.
so... thanks, people.
and as a result of all the crafty gifts she has received, she's been all about art lately. this weekend, while the germ-free part of the family was at church, ella said, "i have art class all set up for us."there is something therapeutic about leaving the dirty dishes to sit and draw with your 6 year old. 
and i must say, there is an advantage to having just experienced the misery known as the first trimester.
compassion.the feeling of not wanting to do a single thing, like get off the couch, brush my teeth, or smile at my children, is still very fresh in mind. that is why i have no problem saying, "sure, you can watch another movie. no, you don't need to clean up your room. why, of course you can have oreos for breakfast."
there were days just a couple months ago i wasn't sure i was going to make it. all i could do was count down the minutes to naptime. i'd get mason to sleep, allow the older two to do whatever quiet thing they could find and remind them they may not come out of their room unless the house is on fire...
and i'd slip into a coma.and then it never failed. the sweet voice of my precious middle born child would penetrate my much needed sleep."mommy..."
i didn't even let him finish. i figured he'd be crying if his arm were severed.
"GET. OUT."
"but mommy -"
"get out now, bennett. and don't come back in."i'd fall back asleep. then he'd come back and whisper. (like that is so much better.)
"mommy, can we have fruit snacks?"
"mommy, i'm really sorry to wake you up again, but ella was just touching my legos.""mommy, i don't want to wake you up but i have to go to the bathroom and is it ok if i flush the toilet or is that too loud?"
"mommy. i'm really sorry to wake you up again. but... mommy, ella called me a peabody!"
oh. dear. God. help me.
its pretty safe to say that the first trimester was not my most effective stage of motherhood. hopefully that thing about children being resilient is true.
anyhow, back to ella. she's doing ok. she insists she's totally fine. never mind the temperature. the persistent irritability, the exhausted look always on her face. but hopefully she'll be completely recovered sometime in the next couple weeks.
the joy of having a little brother is that there is always an opportunity to tease him.
no matter how many years pass, certain things never get old. like teasing him about his big head, warning him about the green bean casserole every thanksgiving, that early morning he ran home shirtless and shoeless in the winter after the truck ran out of gas...
and one of our favorites... getting mono.
from kissing a girl named "monica."naturally, renamed "mono-ca."could the girl have a more perfect name?
only an older sister can take such an unfortunate period of misery in a little brother's life and turn it into something to laugh about.clearly, i wasn't around much when he was suffering. i think i was at college. or just not paying attention to him. i was a teenager. i was self absorbed.this leads me to my revelation of how heartless i was.
ella has been sick for awhile. really sick. fever, nausea, fatigue, loss of appetite (this is a big one. if the 104 on the thermometer didn't tell me anything the refusal of fruit snacks spoke volumes) then her lymph nodes started swelling to such a degree they were actually visible.
this freaks a mom out.we of course went to the doctor. he ordered blood work. ella was a champ. i had to drag the whole clan with us and the boys did amazing too... waiting for an eternity, standing against the wall and "not moving a single inch or else!" while ella got poked and prodded.and then we discovered she has mono. which is really sad of course, but welcome news when your paranoia has considered far worse options.
i called anthony and told him. naturally, how can he not respond with, "but she hasn't even been around mono-ca." (see, it will just always be funny)
but watching her misery, laying around, not wanting to eat, looking so sad... i actually feel a little sorry for chad after all these years.
maybe i do have heart after all.
so chad, even though you probably aren't reading this, sorry for making fun of you.and mostly, sorry for continuing to make fun of you. because even though i now feel bad about the suffering you went through, i'm probably not going to stop.
because even though i love you, you are my favorite family member to pick on.
that should make you feel good, right?
better be a girl.
coming this thursday: awana awards night. the year is wrapping up (no tears in anthony's eyes. aka "mr. super cubbie daddy helper"). it is scheduled for THIS thursday. as in like 5 more nights.
five. MORE. nights.just saying.not that awards ceremonies are all that high on my list of fun things to do.that is, unless i'm anticipating my little perfect first born getting recognized for all of her hard work completing 4 books in a 6 month time period.
FOUR books. pretty big deal. even if i am just a proud mom.so i pictured myself sitting there, proud (possibly smug), maybe teary eyed, cheering, photographing... while they announced to the shocked and completely impressed audience how amazing my daughter is.there would probably be a standing ovation. maybe autograph requests. bible college recruiters.so this past thursday (yes, this PAST thursday) imagine my shock when ella comes home with a trophy.ummm... what did you get a trophy for? is this just preparation for next week when they give you a pure gold medal and rename the city in your honor?i was so confused. everyone knows awards night is NEXT thursday.so i interrogate her. me: so why did you get a trophy?ella: because i did the first book. then i reviewed it. then i did another book. then i did another book. then i did another book.me: but... umm... so... did they give this to you in front of everyone?ella (big smile): yeah.me: like... was it a big deal?ella: well, i kinda don't think the other kids cared, but everyone clapped real hard. and everyone else seemed excited.me ("everyone else"????): um... but... i thought awards night was next week. i'm so confused. why did they give it to you this week?ella: i don't know. but you could have come and taken pictures like all the other moms.me: WHAT?!? all the other moms? who told them but didn't tell me?ella shrugs, and really doesn't seem to care.me: did anyone else get a trophy?ella: just one girl. she's in second grade.me: but... was her mother there?
so i'm so upset with myself and i apologize to ella over and over again. how could i miss this? she keeps telling me its really no big deal. how do i explain its a big deal to ME and my motherly pride!?!please tell me, why on earth a trophy is not passed out on awards night? anthony tells me its because awards night is more to honor the entire awana group and pass out awards to high schoolers and kids who have memorized like the whole bible or something. they don't have time on a night like that to recognize all the individual kids.please. like a i need a practical explanation when we are talking about my daughter.anyhow, all my capitalizing might indicate to you how upset i still am about this.
usually, anthony would have been there. cubbies is over by that time and he and bennett hang in the back of the room for the bible story and flannel graph fun.but not this week.
and let me tell you why.
bennett got recognized for his birthday. they sang to him, gave him a fun birthday hat, and an awesome bag stuffed full of goodies... with his NAME on it.
and some evil little child who may or may not end up in prison some day, stole it. sure, it could have been an accident. he (or she) could have accidentally moved bennett's cubbie bag and craft and mistakenly thought the birthday bag was for them... even though it wasn't their birthday and their name isn't spelled B.E.N.N.E.T.T.but i doubt it.so anthony and the other leaders scoured the place searching for bennett's bag while he desperately fought back his tears. and this all took place during ella's trophy reception. where everyone else was there to cheer her on because not only did she accomplish a pretty significant fete by memorizing so many verses, she was apparently able to do it with absolutely no parental involvement whatsoever.and to think, i was at home putting mason to bed early and watching season 3 of gilmore girls.i'm such a failure.
happy mother's day to the amazing godly woman who made my childhood pretty terrific, became my best friend for life, and can make a perm look totally hot.
i love you, mom.
the only thing i miss of living in phoenix: people.and specifically for this post, my sister and her family.
i don't get to watch my niece and nephews grow up (on a regular basis). no more meeting in the middle at a park or air conditioned mall. or convenient family barbecues. or sitting and chatting with my sister about anything from homeschooling to parenting to how our mom used to torment us as kids when she kicked us out of the van at the corner by the high school making us walk ACROSS THE INTERSECTION instead of pulling in the parking lot to drop us off like civilized human beings because we were so late...so, when i was informed my sisters family was planning a trip to southern california, i jumped on the opportunity to crash their vacation!
oh what fun!
the kids have so much fun playing together. (minus that little detail about mason constantly picking on josh and pulling his ears) 
and we have so much fun sitting in the beach chairs and watching them.as a child, i wondered why my mom never wanted to jump the waves with me. i mean, why was she missing out on all the ocean fun and just sitting and talking to other grown-ups. how b-o-r-i-n-g.yet another mystery solved now that i am older and wiser.
one of the really great things about hanging out with my sisters kids is the simple fact that we both came from the perfect family and as a result are raising perfect families and therefore, our kids will never be a bad influence on each other.ever.
and these two girls:
peas in a pod.
i love watching them together. they get enough time together to enjoy the benefits of sisterhood without actually having to share a room, fight over shotgun, or argue who is going to put the milk away. so while hanging out in our room one day, ella finds the gideon bible in the drawer. ecstatic joy upon this discovery as she exclaims, "mom! the people here believe in Jesus!"
so with the bible on the table, conversation turns to other things. like the motel phone.grace: "wouldn't it be funny if we called up people we didn't know?"(giggles)ella: "yeah! we totally should! and then we can read them the bible!"grace (jumping out of her seat): "yes! and then everyone can know about Jesus!"ella: "we can just start at the beginning... 'in the beginning God created the heavens and the earth...' and we'll keep going until they believe in God!"grace: "this is such a good idea!"squeals, screams and jumping around in circles...(and no, i didn't let them.) i'm so proud of my little over zealous evangelist. we've come a long way from "is your refrigerator running?"
it was such a treat to have them here. (not like grammy is old news or anything) but it was especially nice to have gramma D make the trip.
me and gramma D.
the family. gramma D is second from the left. (i'm of course the adorable child on the left.)
and while they are still trying to sort out things like why are the puzzle pieces supposed to be upside down? and isn't grammy actually her daughter, not her nurse? and why am i supposed to raise my hand over my head when i cough? they still really enjoyed having her here.
she's a kid herself, as happy as can be.
so the amazing women in my life went back to arizona and anthony returns tonight!
