choose life

well, after my lovely post on ill children and my husband who loves them, i ventured over to read what my sister posted for the day. and i must say, instead of wasting your time here reading about the stomach flu, i would like to encourage you to read her blog. its not long, but it is very touching and if you are sleep deprived like me, you might find it difficult to fight back the tears and prevent your blood from boiling all at the same time.

and clearly, you have some time to waste. after all, you are reading my blog.

seriously, just read it: aunt gigi

my husband, my hero

reason # 256 that i love anthony: he cleans up after the kids when they have the stomach flu.

i can't do it. i can't even fake it. i can't pretend like i'm even offering to do it. i just let him take the lead. thank you, Lord, that vomit only happens when daddy is home.

late, LATE last night, after getting bennett safely tucked into bed on old sheets on our floor and explaining AGAIN why there is a big empty bowl next to his head, anthony said, "good thing this happened at night." (meaning, while he was here.) "yeah," i said. "because if not, i would have taken all the kids in the backyard and waited for you to come home." i wasn't joking.

at least bennett is cute a sick kid. after one of his little "episodes" last night, he calls to us saying, "i spilled some." poor thing. and only a couple minutes later he was smiling at us. well, i mean, he was smiling at me. anthony was in the laundry room rinsing out the clothing...

i love you, honey.

someday...

i just might look back and laugh at the following: (read at your own risk)

1. mason pooped all over me.

2. bennett's diaper leaked and he pooped all over ella's bed.

3. my husband hasn't had a day off since Christmas. (and yes, i'm counting weekends)

4. ella hit me after her spanking today. her strong will, defiance and extreme temper-tantrum (or possibly mental breakdown) resulted in the loss of her play kitchen, her cd player, her doll bed, her dolls, her markers... i'm trying to find what works. so far, no luck.

5. while battling my daughter's will, i told her, "honey, you are not going to win." she looked me squarely in the eye and said with a frightening amount of assurance, "oh yes i will." clearly, she doesn't know who she is messing with.

6. my 4 1/2 months without a good night of sleep can be added to total a cumulative almost 2 years of waiting for my children to sleep through the night. there is no anti-wrinkle cream that can reverse the aging i have experienced the last 4 years.

lovely

mason slept until 4:30 this morning. yay....

i would normally be celebrating such a feat. that is, if i weren't up instead with a vomiting 4 year-old.

awwww... thank you for that collective sigh of sympathy.

now can we all say a prayer this doesn't work its way through the rest of us? (specifically my emaciated baby who has no calories to spare and my 2 year-old who hasn't yet mastered the whole make-it-to-the-toilet skill.)

tea party

ella still takes a nap every day. i realize most 4 year-olds are past this phase, but in our house, it isn't optional. some days she doesn't nap, but she still plays in her room for awhile and then stands in the hallway until i see her and she says, "i'm ready to get up now." i say, "no way." she cries and the drama ensues. so i've learned to not look at the hallway. and i've learned that if i don't look, she'll stand there for a loooonnnnnggggg time, waiting patiently. i'm evil, i know.

but since she usually does nap, she often doesn't go to sleep until 10:30 or so. yeah, its way late. but she still "goes to bed" at 8:00 and plays in her room, listens to books on cd, colors, writes letters, etc... its her creative time and i've convinced us that she really loves it and we don't need to phase it out with the naps. she likes her alone time. and so do i...

sometimes she builds some rather interesting structures with blocks. or decorates her room with flashcards and hair ties. and then there is "exercising." seriously, where does she get the energy to jump on the bed for 2 hours?

the other night, it was tea party time.


if only i could train her how to fold laundry...

7

as in the number of scorpions found in our home. just in case you are keeping track. because i sure am.

i just have to say how much i hate scorpions. i mean really. my skin is crawling as i write this and when i close my eyes i envision hundreds of them scurrying across my floor, up the crib legs, into my children's beds... yeah, i really hate them.

you might be one of those people who would tell me they may be scary but they aren't going to kill you. if that is the case, you don't know my dear friend rachael, whose daughter was air evaced to the hospital where she went into convulsions as scorpion venom attacked her central nervous system. yeah, its serious stuff, people.

i spend many waking hours walking through this house in the dark. its a creepy feeling, thinking you are going to step on one at any moment. i now wear slippers, which are laid carefully on my night stand and slipped on after a little shaking, just in case they crawled up the wall or something. but could my slippers really stop one of those little monsters?

this particular scorpion (#7) was found crawling across the kids' playroom. great. they NEVER go in there...

at least i didn't scream this time. not like i did with # 4 when it was crawling out of the drain when i leaned down to spit out my toothpaste. or #5, which i found in the dish i was pulling out of the cabinet.

when we were in kauai (back in the glorious days of sleep and relaxation) i remember seeing houses raised up on stilts. this was of course for flooding, but what a great idea...

or even better... we could just move to kauai...

dress up

last night, ella wanted to play "dress up and show." which means, dress up and put on a show of dancing/jumping on the bed to "bingo" and other annoying children's songs. (when she said "dress up" anthony heard "sweat shop." now there's an idea... we've never played that one before but the play room is disaster so maybe we'll try it out today.)

ella was concerned and said, "mommy, don't you have anything you can dress up in?" oh yes i do! we went to my closet and i got out my wedding dress. funny thing, though... it appears my ribcage has expanded in the past 8 years because it wouldn't zip up. hmmm... at least i got an idea of what i would have looked like had i walked down the aisle already with child.

moral of the story: don't try on your wedding dress after just having your 3rd baby. its not good for your self-image.

a must see

"So great is my veneration for the Bible that the earlier my children begin to read it, the more confident will be my hope that they will prove useful citizens to their country, and respectable members of society." - James Madison (as displayed at From the Dead Sea Scrolls to the Bible in America)

i couldn't even tell you how many bibles we have in our house. i could count them, but since i shouldn't even be sitting here blogging, i certainly don't have the time to count our bibles. but trust me, its a lot.

i share this, not because i think you actually care about our bibles, but because i have realized how easily i take for granted my access to the bible. not just to own it, but to even be able to read it. or to hear it read to me in my own language.

without my children in tow (meaning i could actually concentrate), i had the opportunity to walk through an amazing bible exhibit where i saw fragments of the dead sea scrolls, beautiful torah scrolls, significant bibles hundreds of years old... and i read with fascination how we came to have the bible in our own language. this was no small feat and includes those who risked (and some who sacrificed) their lives so God's Word could be heard.

when reading the accounts of tyndale, wycliffe, luther, etc... i am humbled and convicted that i own numerous copies of the Word of God that i can often make it through the day without reading. so important is his Word that some risked their lives in order that common people could read it and understand it. and so powerful is God that in spite of all earthly obstacles, his Word still remains, true and unchanged.

so yes, i am here to tell you this exhibit is definitely a must see. whether the bible itself interests you or not, the artifacts on display are remarkable and the story told is fascinating.

oh, and the director of this ministry is a total babe.

"...so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." Isaiah 55:11

From the Dead Sea Scrolls to the Bible in America
http://www.dss2009.com/

just needing a little sympathy...

so guess what time my husband got home from work last night? 4:19 am. guess what time he left for work this morning? 5:45 am. i am exhausted just thinking about it.

or, maybe i'm exhausted because i didn't get mason to sleep until 11:15 last night, only to have him wake up slightly before midnight, which was just when i was finally able to begin drifting off to sleep. then around 1:15 i hear bennett calling for daddy and when i realized the other side of my bed was vacant, i headed in his room. he was just chillin', with his hands behind his head, kicking his feet, and asked me, "where's daddy, mom?" eyes wide open, not the slightest bit tired. "at work. go to bed." as i am stumbling back to my room, i realize that anthony had predicted it would be an early night of 11:00 quittin' time so should i be worried he wasn't home?

i thought about it as i drifted back to sleep, only to awake a few moments later to anthony's alarm clock. it happens to be one of bennett's favorite toys. he likes to set it for the middle of the night (always the middle of the night, why not during the day?) so i can wake up and bless his precious name as i turn it off.

15 minutes later, bennett's conversation with himself wakes me up and then he's calling for me again. as i head in his room he said, "cover me up, mom?" it would be cute if it weren't so exhausting.

so since i'm up, i figure i should call my husband and make sure he is still alive. he is, of course, so i head back to bed for a 1/2 hour until mason wakes up again.

not sure at what time i finally fell back asleep. i do know i had to wake up another time for mason and another time because my nose is stuffed up and i couldn't breathe. and then of course i was awake when anthony returned home at 4:19 am. we had a couple "laughs" about life and that he was able to get an hour nap before heading back in this morning. of course mason was up at 6 am and so began my day.

as i was staring vacantly at sesame street this morning, waiting for my caffeine to take effect, i was wondering, "will this ever end?" my house is a disaster, the dishes still haven't been washed from last night, the bathrooms haven't been cleaned in almost 2 weeks, my kids need baths and all i want to do is sleep.

later, at the park, as i was swaying in place with my fussy baby, watching ella and bennett shovel sand together, i was reminded again that yes, it will end. sooner than i will want it to. someday my arms will be empty and i will wish my kids would want to snuggle with me or need me for consoling. i will be able to take a nap at any time of the day because my kids will either be off with friends or in their rooms living their own lives and no longer asking me to organize some pathetic looking craft or fill their sippy cups with water.

i guess i just had to remind myself that they need me now. and even though i really like to sleep, it sure is nice to be needed.

backwards day

yesterday was backwards day. we dressed backwards, ate pasta for breakfast and french toast for dinner. we built upside down lego towers and read books from end to beginning. yeah, watch out... we are wild and crazy around here.

it was my attempt at preserving sanity. i had to come up with some creative way to make it through the day. the last couple of weeks have been what some might refer to as mom torture. so maybe it is a slightly extreme title, but then again....

anthony has been working some 14 to 21 hour days, 7 days a week. he is usually home after we are in bed and out of the house before we wake up (and you know that must be early!) the other night i heard him come in at 10:30 and i said, "oh, home so soon?" to which he laughed and said, "unfortunately, i still have to head back tonight." the poor man is going to end up dead. and then seriously, i won't be far behind.

of course he doesn't usually have to work hours like this. its very unique and hopefully temporary. and it has given me a greater appreciation for him and all he does around here. and while its safe to say that these are not my most effective days of parenting, i am grateful that my husband has a job, and such an important one at that.

among other things, i really miss adult conversation. here are some samplings of what we talk about around here during the day:

ella: why do we always have to say excuse me?
me: what do you mean? when do we say excuse me?
ella: like when we toot. why do we always have to say excuse me?
me: because its polite.
ella: oh.
ella thinks for awhile.
ella: do we need to say excuse me when other people are over at our house and we toot?
me: yes, that would be polite.
ella: sometimes i toot in the bathroom. do i need to say excuse me then?
me: umm... no...
ella: what if the people who come over to our house are in the bathroom with me and i toot? do i need to say excuse me then?
me: umm.... well, i think we'd have a whole other set of problems if that were the case.

me: bennett, don't throw dominoes at the tv
bennett: why? (his favorite phrase)
me (slightly exasperated because shouldn't this be obvious?): because it will break
bennett: why?
me (even more exasperated): if it breaks, you won't be able to watch curious george or any movies ever again.
bennett: daddy get new tv.
me: no, daddy won't get a new tv. we don't have the money for a new tv.
bennett (quiet for awhile as this sinks in) says real softly: oh.
then, as tears start to form in his eyes: watch curious george....

i realized the "scare" tactic may have backfired as i then sat for quite some time consoling my 2 year old over a tv that isn't even broken.

its official

we are going to keep him. yes, there is a light at the end of the perpetual baby fussiness tunnel.

mason's moments of crying are becoming shorter and shorter and some (dare i say it?) have actually been replaced with laughter. laughter! oh the joy. not only do we love our little boy to pieces, we even like him now! (ok, so we always liked him, but if you are a mom of a fussy little baby, you know what i mean...)

baby smiles, coos, and laughs are definitely worth blogging about. now if only we could do something about that sleep...

yes, that's right, i have yet another baby who is allergic to sleep. i am convinced that someday, some brilliant scientist (maybe one of my own children) will discover this "syndrome" from which my children suffer. it is most likely genetic since each of them have been afflicted with it. i will then feel validated.

and yes, in answer to the annoying question "have you tried....?" yes. i have. i have read the baby whisperer, first-time mom, babywise (although i'm quite sure the author of that particular book is a nazi who doesn't even like children), the happiest baby on the block (ha! not at this house), and just about every entry that comes up when i google "how to make my child sleep before i lose my mind!" while these books seem to work for most people (especially those annoying ones who have perfect children who sleep well and then assume its because they have all the answers), they don't work for me.

therefore, i am writing my own book. the title is, whatever works - the tried and tested methods of a sleep deprived mother.

for mason, the only thing that works for sleep is the baby strait-jacket/swaddler (thank you bobo), the side-to-side swing (again, thank you bobo), and the vent fan above my stove (thank you GE). all of these things combined and i am often fortunate to get a good 2 hours of sleep out of the little man. awesome.

i am also working on other chapters in my book... "what to do when your baby decides they are too good for the pacifier" "never underestimate the fun of bouncing and shushing while standing in a pitch black bathroom with the fan on" "the temptation of driving off a cliff to escape infant screaming" "the fear of bullies and the smallest child on the playground" and "i'll have a tummy-tuck with my c-section, please"...

i'll let you know when you can place your advance order on amazon. but until then, a few more pics of our now happy baby...